Ernest 'The Cat' Miller sold a Damian toprope hurricanrana really well.
He's doing a muy tai kickboxer thing now, eh? Great. I'd rather see Damien
in a real wrestling match with someone who can work who isn't green as
grass, but it was a nice toprope hurricanrana.
Sick Boy is showing that he is really, really green now that he has been
put in some matches so you can see how far he actually still needs to go and
shipping him off on the ECW house show circuit was a good idea. Lenny Lane
shows more each week and is pretty okay for a gassed-up chump with bad hair.
Chris Jericho vs Disco Inferno was good. DI took the bumps and went at it
with gusto. Jericho was role modelish and funtabulous as ever. Where is
Ultimo Dragon?
Bill Goldberg defeats Barry Darsow by showing that he's expanded his
repertoire to include moves most guys learn the first week of training.
SHIT COLLIDES WITH SHIT IN THIS ONE FALL MEGA-WRESTLING EVENT! GOLDBERG IS
AAAAAAWESOME! DARSOW IS AAAAAWWESOME! What a fuckin phenom. Where the hell
did put those tapes from Japan?
Dean Malenko wrestles Kidman. Didn't I just see this exact everything on
WCWSN? Is this part of the new atempts to pacify the disgruntled mid-card?
"Hey Malenko, y'all get to do the exact same shit every week just like the
fuckheads at the top!" "Eh. Allright. But you fucked up the Japan deal
though, right? So I'm gonna be wallowing in this hole you call a 'wrestling
company,' wrestling shitty 4 minute matches all year round now with nowhere
else to show what I can really do? Thanks Eric. Golly, you rule."
Brian Adams wrestled Kaos who was accompanied by Rage. Adams really sucks.
He puts asses in the seats though. Boy. He's so over. He really does a
number on Rage and Chaos. Boy. It was the second coming of Stan Hansen and
Bruiser Brodie rolled up into one. What a fierce competitor. What a load
of shit. WHIP ASS.
Scott Norton is brought out by Konnan to beat up Juventud Guerrera in a
brilliant booking move where you get a real BIG GUY to beat the fuck out of
a CRUISERWEIGHT to show that a BIG GUY can really beat the fuck out of a
CRUISERWEIGHT! What a great idea! This will REALLY get Scott Norton over
as a guy who really beat the fuck out of CRUISERWEIGHTS! Boy. I bet the
crowd will start popping for Norton like they do for Goldberg now. "Hey!
That's Scott Norton! He beat the shit out of weak piece of luchadore shit,
Juventud Guerrera! Norton is just AWESOME!" Juventud has to be stoked about
losing his mask in what was basically a WCW WorldWide angle, getting
humiliated by Scott Norton on a Nitro that drew a 5.0 rating and Sunday he
gets to show how he'll "never surrender" as Konan jacks his dick by beating
the piss out of one his "boys" as he gets his "new bigger role in WCW and
the nWo" as a fuckhead who gets to ream Juventud in two countries at once.
WCW can eat my dick.
To further the shittiness of this Juventud angle, Konan- nWo b-team job-boy
who's gonna beat the fuck out of Juventud on Sunday- showed his standing in
the company by jobbing to Davey Boy Smith in two minutes. KICK ASS!
Booker T beat Chavo Guerrero in three minutes. This sucked. This wasn't a
match and a waste of Chavo and Booker T.
Ric Flair needs to retire. He's less than a shell of his former greatness.
Hell, he's almost fifty years old. Run for congress or something- just quit
making it harder to remember Steamboat/Flair and the Funk/Flair I quit
match. Curt Hennig is quite there. I don't know who tunes in to see him
wrestle. Christ knows I don't since he pussed out of a Benoit feud. Fannypants.
Hollywood Hogan and The Outsiders wrestled Sting, The Giant, and Randy
Savage. Supposedly, Hogan won a power struggle with Scott Hall to keep Hall
from doing the survey and that explains the Nash interview and then Hogan
did that interview and blahblahablahblah- God, you don't give a shit about
Hogan, Nash and the inside circle jerk of power that is fucking the actual
wrestling that could take place in WCW right up the ass and neither do I.
They tried to have a match and the Giant and Nash skipped out early- I'm
guessing because they both stink and didn't want to work anymore tonight. I
think it's funny tht people think the Giant is still capable of doing a
moonsault or ever could. He's making a good run at becoming fatter than
Yokozuna since he debuted. He can barely walk now, much less use any of his
"athletic ability." HEY! LOOK! It's Ed Leslie! The parasitic tapeworm who
feeds off of Hulk Hogan's fecal spray! He sure does a mean Chartbuster.
He's so over. Look at the asses in the seats. Kick ass.
I'll be happier next week I'm sure! WOO-HOO!
There you have it.
DEAN!
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