Hey! I liked this one TOO much! Sorry I'm late but Zero Hour is approaching for the new youngster so I'm a little preoccupied these days so get off my back because as a GREAT man once said,"Pay backs are a bitch and I'm the bitch from hell."

The whole Benoit/Flair angle leading up to the superhot match was about the best self-contained angle and match that WCW has ever pulled off. The subtext was great and very 1980's NWA in its scope: Benoit trusting Flair one last time because of blind emotion and wishful thinking taking over the usually calculating Crippler, the tease of Saturn and establishing the mutual respect with Benoit that will explain Saturn's actions later, Arn Anderson buying Flair's story whole-heartedly and trying to keep his Horsemen together at any cost after Flair betrays Benoit, Benoit sees the hot tag opportunity and picks Saturn because he can trust him more than the Horsemen- though Anderson is basically risking his life to help Benoit. DDP puts Saturn over clean as a sheet- DDP and Bigelow get the new champions over big and then set-up the PPV match with the Bill Wattsian heel stompdown to accomadate the Kanyon turn. This was booked perfectly- which has a lot more to do with everybody being hurt and the default workers including the best over worker in the company (Benoit) and the most easily to get over with any kind of push worker (Saturn). DDP/BamBam/ Kanyon vs Raven/Benoit/Saturn is a good turn for the tag belts considering it was looking like it was heading back to the hideous realm of the Steiners, Hall and Nash, Sting/Luger and that shitty ilk. The match itself was really good as DDP thanks God everyday that he gets wrestle with Benoit, since Benoit made him look great. BamBam fucking ruled again by bumping like a freak and Benoit just rules the goddam world as he is suddenly in a wildly over tagteam that elevates Saturn and makes Benoit an intersting face for once. I hope they can't figure out a way to fuck this up.

I was torn over the Riggs/Lane match. A certain unnamed member of DVD-Foghat, between gulping spoonfulls of Betty Crocker Icing straight from the can, assured me that when I finally got around to watching the match, that it was a solid little match and that I would definately stick it in this side of the equator. It's here and all, but totally because it was a slightly above average Extendo Worldwide Exclusive and because Lenny Lane actually hit a Rotation Powerbomb. The body of the match was pointless and didn't build to anything. It was killing time until two moves at the end and then Riggs wins anyway with Rocker Dropper- so IIIII dunno. Yeah, it just barely worked but it should have been better.

Rey Misterio should drop the motherfucking belt to SOMEONE before getting any further into this feud with Hennig and Duncum, but on face value, all these matches have worked- mostly because Rey is so good at working with big guys and he also makes his own offense look all tricky and neat as a counter to various heavyweights comical offenses. Duncum bumped and tried to sell in his limited way and then the screwjob kicked in. The tag match will be good on PPV but it should be a Thunder match, not something I would have to pay for. Cuz fuck knows I'm not paying for this next one.

Eric Bischoff the total asshole on commentary is fun because I think it's how he actually is and everyone knows that the best wrestling gimmicks are when they embody the true essence of talent.

Mach. Big Leslie. BOOBIES! POOP! I don't wanna know who gets into this kinda crap. I'm guessing mental rejects and fecophilic perverts make up a large demographic or- judging by the ratings- not. Miss Madness is good little worker.

Ernest Miller and Horace have a match that basically embodies everything I hate about US wrestling- two unover nepotismically pushed guys bore the fuck out of ME until they hit the shitty screwjob ending. Ernest Miller on PPV means that I'll have money to throw around on June 12th! Drinks on me! WOO-HOO! Flair vs Piper AGAIN! That's six pitchers for all of us! Thank you, WCW, for once again saving me thirty dollars I would usually spend on YOU if you presented anything I felt warranted thirty bucks spent. A GAB .016 buyrate is a boon for the US bar industry!

WCW seems to be trying to do with Randy Savage what New Japan did with Masa Chono- y'know, once the body goes and he can longer work at the highest level, try to get him over with the rubes big as a cool heel. The problem here is that while Masa Chono is the coolest heel in the history of wrestling next to Dump Matsumoto, the WCW will never find a way to make Savage cool. It's like WCW's attempts to make Piper look uncorpselike. WCW has tried to make up for the uncool codgerness of Savage by giving him all the ladies, but BOOBIES! don't make up for lack of innate coolness. Savage is SO Eighties and so old that they will never get true Chonoization. Sting they MIGHT be able to Chonoize but saddle him with the Load called Luger and having them feud with the Steiners ain't helping anybody. This is all gonna suck for a while. At least WCW still has Benoit to keep it interesting for a few minutes at least.

Fuck, Gancarski is right about Buff when it comes to this crappy match with Disco- Buff is all kinds of Luger in this, including the prerequisite Show-More-Daylight-Than-Ed-Leslie-Wrestling-Hulk-Hogan spot when Buff does the shittiest corner ten-punch thing I've ever seen. DI ain't helping anyone anymore, but Buff is better than this.

I'm guessing the person in the Hummer is a person who paid good hard money for any of the Deisel vs Undertaker matches on PPV during Nash's horrendous WWF title run.

THERE YOU HAVE IT.

DEAN RASMUSSEN.
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