"write something you lazy fuck - PLEASE" - a fan
The Rock gave about as good an interview as he can, which in my mind still
sucks but I'm going to pat him on the back for making his monkeys chant his
name. Just what the hell do people see in this guy> I mean, *besides* the
colossal ego. Actually, the best thing here was Mark Calloway bringing some
flavour to his interview with a southern drawl and talking like the bad
ass kicking bastard that he should be playing. Oh yeah, got one of those.
Ken Wayne Shamrock in a straight jacket reminded me of all that Ric Flair
wrestling a broom talk that was the hot topic of smart conversation back in
the day. This was the best match of the show unless you like watching two
incompetent top dog heels failing to put away the cloying next-to-the-top
babyface. Go Ken, go!
The Acolytes vs. Kane wasn't much but it was WRESTLING on a card devoid of
wrestling so one time and one time only, it worked. It helped that Kane took
the single best bump of his career that wasn't on PPV OR that I didn't see
OR that I don't remember seeing. The finish was cool because strong heels
are good 'cos Bill Watts says so!
Ollie
With the disclaimer out of the way that IT'S NOT WRESTLING, the drunk in me got a
kick out of Steve Austin doing a parody of a parody of himself. I want to steal
CRZ's joke so I will:
"My first day on the job and you bring me LIGHT beer?!"
Vince as the Greater! Higher! Super! Power was the dogs bollocks and that's
about all I have to say about this week's booking rollcall. Except to add
that I dug Pat Patterson's futile attempt to hide his hella cool french accent.
Do you remember when Don "The Real Rock" Muraco hung Ricky Steamboat on a
Saturday morning? That freaking ruled! Do you think you will remember Mr. Ass
hanging Road Dog just seconds into their dog collar match? Not terrible but
short and NO psychology so no, it didn't work.
At the very least, Ivory is the best wrestler on the women's roster so
giving her the title is a step in the right direction. I guess the
brunette chicks are the heels. Uh...I don't have to come right out and
say that this match sucked, do I?
I still haven't seen one of those legendarily bad Prince of Darkness matches
(both opponents blindfolded) but I'm guessing that Bossman vs. Test was a
close approximation of the suckiness to be found therein. You gotta do this
kind of gimmick as a shoot to make it half-way inriguing. Instead Test
looked like the weekend warrior that he is.
The booking behind the X-Pac/Paul Wight/Kane angle was solid and I was waiting
to see how it played out but a couple of spin kicks from Sean Waltman ain't
gonna cut it.
I like the old school flair that Patterson and Brisco muster to the dance so
watching the load of goo Mabel almost put two more notches on his cripple
belt didn't do it for me.
I said it up there and I'll say it again, the main event sucked. Helmsley
is sinking in the filthy sewer of suck that is the Ministry of Corporate Darkness.
Go ahead and reform a heel DX already.
main Workrate page
main nCo page